Scientists Discover Oldest Skeleton Of Human Ancestor; Report Face Looked Like Hugo Chavez

The most well-preserved skeleton of an ancestorprecursor of homo sapiens may have believed in
of homo sapiens has been discovered in Ethiopia.the devil. One of the scratchings has been
The skeleton, dating back about 3.3 million years,translated that states, "If you're looking for the
is a member of the evolutionary group known asdevil, first look into a reflecting pool."Meanwhile,
Australopithecus Venezuelas and had a face thatHugo Chavez, on hearing about the remains,
looks remarkably like Hugo Chavez.Scientists haveasked that they be turned over to Venezuela,
yet to determine if the homonid retainedbecause, if the ancient person did look just like
tree-climbing capabilities. Apparently, its arms hunghim, he or she may be a distant ancestor, and so,
below its knees, and it had a short neck like ahe reasons, the remains belong to the Chavez
gorilla. As they free more of the skeleton fromfamily.He has also voiced the intention to lug the
the sandstone in which it was found, they will berock with the etchings on it to his next speech at
able to determine if it did climb trees.Remains ofthe UN, where he plans to say he took its advice
an ancient manuscript were also found buried withand looked into a reflecting pool to see the devil.
the skeleton. It appears to be the work of anHe saw George Bush, because right before he
ancient medicine man who identifies himself aslooked, he tossed in a photograph of him.Tom
Neander Chompsky. Experts are attempting toAttea, humorist and creator of has had six shows
decipher the language in which it is written.Theproduced Off-Broadway. Critics have called his
scientists also discovered scratchings on a rock.writing "delightfully funny," "witty," with "great
So far they have been able to determine that thehumor and ebullience" and "good, genuine laughs.